The Ups and Downs of Life

I have had a hectic two days...full of ups and downs.

First lets go to the ups....they are fewer than the downs

Up no 1 - Dr J called me on Wednesday. He got a second opinion of my B's swimmers from Prof K. Prof K agreed with Vitalab's assessement but told us to take 5mg Folic acid and 40 mg Zinc for three months. This could help. We are definitely giving it a shot

Up no 2 - I have one more sleep before I go and see our Spiritual Healer. I am so in need of some soul searching and guidance....I really need it..really need it

Now onto the Downs

Down no 1 - My brother emailed me yesterday to tell me that his wife wants a divorce. I was gutted. My brother and his wife have always been a good pair in my eyes. My brother waited 37 years for his wife...what I mean..and don't laugh..he was still a virgin when he got married at 37. I have always admired him for his respect for his wife and two children. He is a good man. My SIL had a hysterectomy a few months ago and since then has fallen into a depression...and has resulted in her wanting a divorce. I started my morning in tears. Almost like the end of a dream....

Down no 2 - I have been back at work for 1.5 weeks after being off for a month. I have worked my arse off and have got my Financials completed and I am almost up to date. However, when I got back, I discovered one of the staff had hidden an outstanding Debtors by not invoicing it out. I immediately contact myHDR department to deal with it. However, my MD is back from leave...and came for his weekly meeting. He tore me apart saying that the management at our branch are useless. He belittled me and my fellow managers telling us he hated coming to our branch because we are all incompetent. He moaned because I was not 100% up to date with my work. I HATE this place. I have threatened to leave so many times...but it is like a cult. You know it is wrong..but for some reason you just cannot let go. It is like a shiny apple with a big fat worm eating it from the inside....Yet again I was in tears

Down no 3 - I decided to log onto the fertility forum to get an update on all the lovely ladies. My friend, Chloe, who has been trying for a baby, fell pregnant in December..just before Xmas. She went for her 7 week scan yesterday and the "sac" was empty....I was devastated. This infertility journey takes you through such highs and then throws you to the curb like a dog.

So today I am not a happy bunny. 2010 held so many promises, hopes and dreams. Today it just feels like a continuation of 2009 soul breaking year

Sorry